Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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