he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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