Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I love you.
Bad choice
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