just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
