It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize