week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
