this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
What drink are we having for lunch?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
