There is no way he is gay with that hair.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You took a bar mat shot.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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