She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
