I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
