Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.

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  (516): She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food. http://tfl.nu/a6vh
  Replies (14) Good night (3363) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.

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  (860): i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug. http://tfl.nu/sjuy
  Replies (25) Good night (3339) Bad night (608) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac

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  (206): alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac http://tfl.nu/kfdr
  Replies (5) Good night (2981) Bad night (465) Order T-Shirt
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  (830): View more from Texas

  she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.

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  (830): she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again. http://tfl.nu/v31h
  Replies (17) Good night (922) Bad night (4596) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.

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  (250): I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you. http://tfl.nu/p3o8
  Replies (15) Good night (9352) Bad night (829) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends

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  (919): every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends http://tfl.nu/8jwh
  Replies (7) Good night (2808) Bad night (845)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days

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  (773): I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days http://tfl.nu/nte6
  Replies (9) Good night (2538) Bad night (861) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.

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  (717): It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards. http://tfl.nu/wgpg
  Replies (2) Good night (1659) Bad night (499) Order T-Shirt
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.

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  (306): You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons. http://tfl.nu/ly4h
  Replies (4) Good night (1267) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.

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  (303): Get a piano. I want to have sex on it. http://tfl.nu/t29o
  Replies (19) Good night (2010) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.

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  (505): Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit. http://tfl.nu/tchi
  Replies (3) Good night (1168) Bad night (256) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today

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  (512): I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today http://tfl.nu/x2es
  Replies (9) Good night (833) Bad night (396) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.

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  (304): The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me. http://tfl.nu/eykr
  Replies (8) Good night (354) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.

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  (410): Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night. http://tfl.nu/tzdh
  Replies (2) Good night (278) Bad night (841) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.

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  (316): You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off. http://tfl.nu/rf92
  Replies (4) Good night (136) Bad night (476) Order T-Shirt

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