does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
