you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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