is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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