Me too!
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
