I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
