Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize