hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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