There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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