he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
