forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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