May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
