i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
