i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
