you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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