? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
