Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
