im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
