Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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