im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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