took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
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Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
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I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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