What a fucking waste of an outfit
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
