Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
