I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I'm really busy with my period
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