Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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