i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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