we have officially mastered the walk of shame
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize