Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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