Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
is wine microwaveable?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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