Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
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And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
did i walk over a car last night?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
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I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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