Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
