She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
