THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
