omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
