did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
