I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
