does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
