Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I FOUND THE LEGS
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
