I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
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Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
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Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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