Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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