We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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